I started my 30s as an engaged woman with a date and wedding venue secure, and on the hunt for “everything else” – an officiant, photographer (I think – I may have already had him booked), etc… And, of course THE DRESS (I probably had that done by October. I got engaged in June, booked the venue in July and was working on “everything else” from that time onward). I had a blog that I was about to make over (from Prospere Magazine to DelectablyChic!) and was going to various blogging events like Fashion Week, product launches and restaurant openings. I ended the decade with a completely new start. I closed DelectablyChic! and started this site, a more personal one where I can share my own views a little more liberally. I also became a mother with the help of a surrogate. It wasn’t something I thought I’d be doing at 30 (being a mom was definitely in the picture at that time, but I saw myself staying in the lifestyle blogging world, transitioning to mom blogging). Though I had always been interested in philanthropy, I never thought I’d be a philanthropy advisor.
So what do I see for my 40s? First and foremost, I want my son to have an amazing childhood. I want to see every step of his growing up. I don’t want to inundate him with activities – kids are way too over-scheduled these days – but I also don’t want him to miss out on anything. (He’s a very active boy at 10 1/2 months, and though he’s a little bit behind in crawling (he might be the type who doesn’t REALLY crawl and goes from tummy crawling to walking) he seems to love to…plank. And he’s an eater (my poor grocery bills)! He’s also got quite a voice. I wasn’t there for his birth – my surrogate delivered in St. Catharines and it’s about two hours away from Toronto – but was told that he led out a LOUD scream when he came out (and that it was unusual for babies his gestational age, 35 weeks and one day). So music classes and sports it will be). I also want to focus even more on philanthropy, perhaps even starting my own organization. There are a lot of areas which don’t get enough focus. For example, mental health for children of immigrants. We talk a lot about cultural diversity, but often, we focus on the immigrant generation only, focusing on not only cultural issues, but language. Mental health awareness is still a bit behind in my ancestral cultural community. While there are organizations which specifically focus on East Asians, they tend to target those who are new to the country, focusing on language issues. I’d like for organizations to focus on the second generation, those who don’t have language issues but still straddle between two cultures but feel more comfortable discussing in English or French. People like me. After all, it takes at least three generations to fully integrate.
Mental health is not the only focus. I’m also very much interested in neurological conditions. As someone who has a neurological issue herself (epilepsy), I’m always researching complimentary methods of treatment. I’m not looking to go of medication (though it would be nice), I’m hoping that treatment such as meditation, music and/or art therapy could help the ease for those with more issues than me. Epilepsy is not the only condition I would like to focus on. Dementia, MS and others could also benefit from various types of art. And, of course, music and art therapy (as well as meditation) is an excellent way to curb stress and anxiety.
I also want to focus on my personal health. It’s not that I have any major health issues other than the epilepsy. I AM considered “middle aged” now. And I have to start becoming more cautious. I already eat right and work out several times a week. I can continue to do what I do and probably be fine for the next little while. I’m trying to be more plant-based. I was doing fine a few years ago on a very Mediterranean/East Asian focused plan (meaning I was not eating “land meat”) before 5 pm. Somehow, I kind of fell off that bandwagon. I think I’m going to try to get back on that, at least during the week.
I also have a dream to help women-focused and woman-run businesses. I’ve supported, in the form of crowdfunding, numerous small businesses, but I want to do more. I’m not sure where to start, or if I even COULD start. I don’t really have the funds, of course, and honestly, even if I did, is it too late? I’m 40 and I feel I’m a bit too old. And I don’t have a finance background. My undergrad is in drama and history and my master’s in the History of Education. The only business-focused education I’ve had are corporate communications (i.e. PR) and fundraising management certificates. Anyway…
I AM really looking forward to what’s to come this decade. I said that with my 30s, too. I’m sure there’d be tons of surprises. After all, I thought my family would be made through international adoption, not surrogacy! Starting a family with the help of a gestational surrogate wasn’t even in the picture for us 10 years ago!
Image credit: Sean Locke Photography/ShutterStock
