Honestly, I don’t know. And it’s not just an ethnic thing. I could bring up the whole Hong Kong issue – am I allowed to say that I side with the protesters? Or can I not, because I’m not REALLY a Hong Konger, but merely someone with roots there (I was called out on a Facebook page a few weeks ago by some guy. First of all, how did he know I wasn’t a Hong Konger (because of my married last name? Buddy (OK Boomer?), I could STILL be married to someone non-Chinese and LIVE in Hong Kong. Oh, and he called me a nasty name because I “looked” a certain way. Not getting into that…I should have called him out for using Facebook (since Facebook is blocked in mainland China) AND the fact that he had an “English” first name)? Am I allowed to say that I DO get it, and that I’m getting fatigued with all the race (goodness, I hate that word)/ethnic related posts I’m seeing on social? Or is that not PC? And if we’re talking about more equality, why aren’t we bringing up the lack of services due to linguistic services some communities face? I’ve asked about it, only to be dismissed. Why?
Some say that because I’m Asian, the kind of discrimination I can face is “different,” but not everyone in my ethnic community grew up in suburban comfort with the stereotypical extracurriculars such as music lessons and summer enrichment camps (or trips back to the old country) while growing up. Some had parents who ran small businesses just to make ends meet. Not everyone is a child of a doctor or engineer, nor did everyone grow up with English-speaking parents. Heck, I know suburbanites whose parents barely speak English. And I don’t mean Gen Xers and millenials who now live in the suburbs. I mean people my age who grew up there, yet have parents who struggled with language. I suppose the good thing is this: Here in Toronto and depending on ethnic background, one CAN get nearly every service in their ancestral language. I know that for Cantonese speakers, one can DEFINITELY get by speaking ONLY Cantonese for a full week (or these days, a month). Is that even fair? Why aren’t we offering more services so people can practise their English? And if we’re supposed to be encouraging more diversity and ending systemic discrimination, why can’t we talk about this?
I’ve been dismissed time and time again, even before Black Lives Matter was a blip on the radar. Somehow, I’m just a whiner, something nearing a “Karen” (no offence to women named Karen). The truth is, we NEED these kinds of services. We also need programs to help new Canadians/immigrants navigate certain systems, maybe even “unlearn” some beliefs, such as mental health awareness. As I noted a few years ago, the destigmatization of mental health awareness in (many) East Asian cultures is far behind the mainstream. Many people STILL believe that it’s a curse to the family (well, it’s TRUE that some issues are genetic, but sweeping it under a rug doesn’t change anything. It’s still hereditary). And, of course, telling strangers about your inner problems, even in private, is just airing dirty laundry. These kinds of habits need to be unlearned. If one culture can do this, so can others. It’s not discrimination to do this. It’s NOT trying to “mainstream” someone. But somehow, people think otherwise. It’s unfortunate.
I get this is sensitive. I get that we really need to watch HOW we do this, so that it doesn’t sound like we’re dictating and trying to tell other people what to do. But sometimes, things need to change, and often, policies and the lack of services, especially services to help people change beliefs aren’t happening BECAUSE we’re being too sensitive. It’s a double whammy. We can’t sound like colonialists, erasing cultures of certain groups, YET, certain groups are behind in the need to change (see my mental health comment above). What makes things worse is how some cultures look down on certain careers. For example, if being a doctor is considered a “good thing” in a certain culture, yet, this person decides to go into psychiatry, he or she might be viewed as “less” than, say, a cardiologist or GP. To that, I say, WTF. But hey, no one’s listening, so #whatever.
Without culture-sensitive services, nothing is going to change, and there may STILL be a lack of services. So what do we do, just wait a few generations until more people just become integrated? Survival of the fittest? We can’t do that. But like I said, no one really cares about this point. The most vocal of activists right now have their own agenda and the rest of the world is just hopping on THEIR bandwagon and not other people’s. SIGH.
Image credit: VectorKnight/Shutterstock
